You’ve heard the cliché: “Never discuss politics or religion.” That’s too bad. Both are important topics that have significant consequences for everyone in this life or the next. So, why avoid discussing them?
Sadly, people who disagree about politics and religion tend to lose their temper, and their conversations devolve to yelling, name-calling, and strained relationships. Even online—where people have time to give calm and measured responses—you find that people are rude. Our inability to hold a productive conversation highlights a glaring problem in our society: We are unable to engage in healthy arguments.
But arguing isn’t nice, productive, or healthy, many people think. That’s not true. It depends on your definition. For example, the word “argue” comes from the Latin root arguere, which means (in part) “to make clear or prove.” There’s nothing wrong with making things clear or proving a point. From this root, we get “argue” (a verb), “argument” (a noun), and “argumentative” (an adjective). Let’s consider each of these terms and explain their significance.
To argue (verb): When we consider the meaning of the Latin root, it’s clear that arguing—i.e., proving a point or explaining our ideas so they’re understood—is a virtue. In fact, it’s essential to any civil society. Without the ability to argue, it’s difficult to discover truth or discern error. Plus, arguing trains your mind and enhances critical thinking skills. In the long run, you’ll become better at evaluating different ideas.
Though people may feel uneasy about arguing with someone, it’s often not because they are arguing, but because they are doing it in an inappropriate manner (we’ll get to this in a minute). But arguing in and of itself isn’t a vice. When you argue, though, you need to direct your efforts at producing something that’s vital to a productive conversation: an argument.
Argument (noun): When you disagree with someone, try to formulate an argument or encourage the other person to offer one. An argument is a very particular thing. It contains two parts: a claim and evidence/reasons. Both components are essential. Remember a key principle, though: Whoever makes the claim bears the burden of proof. In other words, if you offer your opinion about a matter, then you are responsible to provide evidence or reasons for it.
For example, if you claim that God exists, then you must show why you think that claim is true. If you don’t, then you’ve merely given your opinion that God exists (a claim) but have not produced an argument. The only way to turn a claim into an argument is to provide evidence that shows the claim is true. For example, to provide evidence for the claim that God exists, you might bring up the fact that since the universe began to exist, something must have caused it to begin. By providing evidence for that claim, you have produced an argument.
Now it makes sense for your friend to evaluate your argument to determine whether it’s persuasive or unconvincing. Furthermore, it’s possible your friend could provide a counterargument, which you could evaluate. This process can go back and forth, thereby enabling the two of you to learn from each other as you discover what’s true and what’s not. That’s healthy discourse, provided you are not argumentative.
Argumentative (adjective): This is what many people associate with arguments—being argumentative. Too often, people engage in arguments in a particular manner. They are belligerent, crass, condescending, and rude (to name a few). That’s not what’s supposed to happen. When you engage another person in an argument, you should be calm, patient, gracious, and not assume the most uncharitable interpretation of what they said. Remember, you’re an ambassador for Jesus (2 Cor. 5:20). How you come across to other people is going to reflect on who you represent—Jesus. Therefore, you aren’t justified in being rude even if the other person isn’t kind.
Remember Paul’s admonition to his protégé in 2 Timothy 2:24–26. He writes,
The Lord’s bond-servant must not be quarrelsome, but be kind to all, able to teach, patient when wronged, with gentleness correcting those who are in opposition, if perhaps God may grant them repentance leading to the knowledge of the truth, and they may come to their senses and escape from the snare of the devil, having been held captive by him to do his will.
We shouldn’t quarrel, but engage others in a kind, gentle, and patient manner as we make an argument. Our goal is to correct mistaken thinking so that others can escape the falsehoods of the enemy and repent. May God grant us the wisdom and words to make a compelling case for his truth.